The last story Pip told me about his life was the last time he saw Provis alive. Over the past few days Pip visited him in the prison infirmary, reading to him sadly. Provis could not talk and everytime he took a breath pain shot through his body. When his trial came about it was over very quickly. This was because his crime was returning to Europe and it was impossible to say that he did not return. He was tried with many other men and women who committed the same crime. Many of them cried out in horror while others were shocked into silence. His sentence was death. However, he died ten days after being sentenced, right before his hanging was scheduled. Pip was at his deathbed when he told Provis in his final hour that his daughter was still alive. On the verge of tears, he told him that she became a beautiful young lady and he was in love with her. After hearing this news, Provis quietly passed away with a smile on his face. Pip's last words to him were, "Oh Lord, be merciful to him, a sinner."

The attempted plan to save Provis was told to me by Pip on his seventy-first birthday. The plan was for Pip, Herbert, and Startop to meet Provis at the side of the Thames river, getting there by row boat, stay the night in an inn near the sea, and then row out to meet a ship going back to Australia. This happened in perfect sequence with no problems until the end of the plan. Pip, Herbert, and Startop rowed right up to Provis after a few minutes of boating, landing at the side for the shortest of times. As soon as Provis entered the boat, he immediately professed his thankfulness for what Pip was dioing for him. Pip sheepishly replied that he knew what it was like to be free and didn't want to see him without that right. It took them until the end of the day for them to reach the inn. There, they were informed by the Jack that a four-oared galley landed with a stone two gallon jar for beer. They all went to sleep and woke up early to catch the boat. At 1:00, they all saw the smoke from the boat and rowed out to meet it. Suddenly, to Pip's dismay, the four-oared galley sailed out from under the bank and intercepted them. A man in the galley called out that they weretransporting a criminal that had returned from where he was banished and that they were going to aprehend the man known as Provis, or Abel Magwitch. They then rammed the rowboat into the path of the oncoming ship's paddles. The boat was destroyed and five men were knocked into the water: Pip, Provis, Herbert, Startop, and another man who turned out to be the other convict, Compeyson. Pip, Herbert, and Startop were hauled into the boat, but both the convicts went under. Provis survived with an injury to the head and chest and was immediately handcuffed when he was pulled aboard, but Compeyson did not (serves him righ, that traitor). Herbert and Startop were let off the boat to travel to London by land, while faithful Pip stayed by hurt Provis, very scared and concerned for Provis' and his own future.

Pip, now in his home town visiting Joe and Biddy, sent me a letter concerning more on Estella's parentage and background. After the fire at Miss Havisham's house. Herbert took Pip home and dressed his burns. While Pip was away, Herbert learned more about Provis and his background, which he told Pip when he woke up. He was married and had a child with a woman. He was cheating on his wife with another woman. This woman was found dead by means of throttling in a barn. The woman was tried and found not guilty (WOW, Molly is Provis's wife and Estella is his daughter). The night the wother woman was killed Provis's wife took their child, which was a girl, and told Provis that she would destroy the child so that he would never see it again. He never did see it again. Pip, thinking this story sounded extremely familiar, asked Herbert when this had happened. He replied that it had happened three or four years before Pip had met Provis in the churchyard, making the child about as old as him. Pip, very excited, then told Herbert what he had found out by combining everyone's stories together. That Provis was Estella's father!

Pip, now telling his tale right next to me, went to the business side of town, looking for a place to eat. Here, Mr. Jaggers met him and asked him if he would dine with himself (Mr. Jaggers) and Mr. Wemmick. Pip agreed to do so and went with Jaggers to fetch Wemmick. Once they had done so, they took a coach to Mr. Jaggers' house. There they ate dinner, with Jaggers' faithful servant Molly to wait on them. Wemmick delivered a letter from Miss Havisham to Pip, which stated that she wanted to talk to him about a proposition that he had made her on his past visit. Pip eagerly told them that he would leave first thing in the morning. The first item of gossip at the table was Estella and Bentley Drummle getting married. They drank a toast to Estella and left it at that. Meanwhile, Jaggers chastised Molly a few times for being slow and, as Pip watches her, he begins to see that she is Estella's mother. Molly doesn't look like her child, but her hands and eyes were the same (very unusual, that doesn't happen very often, I mean, who says, "You have your mother's hands"?). After dinner, Wemmick and Pip left together, at which time Pip began to ask questions about Molly and how she was tamed by Mr. Jaggers. Wemmick proceeded to tell Pip about how she was aquitted for murder of a large, strong woman ten years older than her, who was found dead in a barn. This large woman had had an affair with Molly's husband, which was why she was tried. However, when she was tried, she looked a lot less strong than she really was because her clothes were concealing her true figure. The only thing amiss were the backs of her hands, which were lacerated. Mr. Jaggers was her lawyer and proved that the lacerations were from brambles because traces of brambles were in her hands and pieces of her dress were on the brambles and therefore was aquitted. She also had a child, which was female, but she was said to have killed it. Pip, knowing this information was now positive that Estella was Molly's child, excused himself from Wemmick's presence and walked home, with this unusual development on his mind.

Pip was out for the day, but called me to tell the story of how he confessed his love for Estella. She had again travelled to Miss Havisham's house, and there she was, sitting right next to Miss Havisham and knitting. Pip proceded to tell them how he had found out who his patron was and that it was not Miss Havisham, as he expected. He also pointed out that it was not nice of Miss Havisham to lead him on to thinking that it was her, to which she cried out that she shouldn't have been nice(Jeese, why shouldn't she be nice? He was a small peasant boy with no future and wasn't nice to him. Greedy, sick old hag.). He also requested of Miss Havisham that she help Herbert with his debt because he and his father were so kind to Pip, and were great teachers (they definitely deserve any reward Pip wishes to give them. Pip, now feeling very desperate, then turns to Estella and reveals his profound love for her (idiot, you're getting way ahead of yourself dude). He protests that she can not fall in love with Bentley Drummle for the sole reason that he was a mean, stupid brute, and that Pip had loved her longer than Bentley did. She replied that she loved Drummle and that they were already going to be married. Pip, in tears now, pleaded with Estella to be his love and not Drummle's, but Estella politely refused (can't you see that my chum Pip is twice the man Bentley Drummle is!!! She's gonna end up like Miss Havisham!). Pip left for his house in tears, heart broken once again by Estella.

Pip is a great story teller, and out did all the other stories of his life with this one, where Pip meets Pconvict once again. Pconvict walked into Pip's home and pip asked if anyone was there. There was and this person came up and started talking to Pip (who is this freaky old dude). Pip finally recognized him as Pconvict right after he told Pip how bravely he had acted when he was a child. Pip, now kind of thinking," How does this stalker now where I live?", wants Pconvict out of the house as fast as possible because he didn't want to be seen with a former criminal. He is very nervous in this situation and acts very snobbish toward Pconvict. Pip found out that Pconvict was doing very well and was working as a sheep farmer in Australia. He was practically a celebrity in his job. Before Pconvict left, Pip asked him to stay for some hot water and rum, which he did. However, he treats the convict like trash. Pip even tells Pconvict to keep his hands off him when he goes to hug Pip in thanks (ungrateful, inconsiderate snob). Pip also informed Pconvict that he received his gift of two pounds from his messenger and wished to return the money. He paid Pconvict the money, but he, unusually, rolled the two pound notes up and set fire to them (what the heck are you doing, Pip is in debt, he needs all the extra cash he can get). He then began to ask how Pip came by his great expectations, who was his benefactor, and what land he was going to inherit, all of these things, Pip had no answer to. So Pconvict made a few guesses, that the amount of money Pip received when he came of age started with a five (creepy), that the name of his guardian was a lawyer by the name of Jaggers (stalker), and that he had found Pip's address by writing to Pip's good friend Wemmick (OMG!!! He's Pip's benefactor!!!). Pconvict, very excited, now exclaimed," I did it all! I'm your benefactor! I've made you a gentleman!" Pip is now reeling with shock. How could this convitct be his benefactor? It made no sense. But his explanation was right and he knew everything concerning his life as a gentleman! When he had made certain that Pconvict was his benefactor, Pip offered him Herbert's room because he wouldn't be back from his trip to Marseilles for a while. Pconvict then told Pip that they must be very cautious because his sentence was that he could never return to Europe and he would be put to death if caught there (idiot, why would you come back if you would be put to death?).
All of his money and property would also go to the government, leaving Pip with no inheritance (even worse, leaving the boy you worked to help so long with nothing if you were caught). When Pconvict had gone to bed, Pip sat down, completely draind, bewildered, and devastated. He had always thought that miss Havisham was his benefactor and that she had plans to get him and Estella together. He also felt horrible about how he left Joe and Biddy. The rest of the night, Pip jumped at every sound, afraid that someone would come in and find him housing a convict.

Pip is telling me the story of the first large bump in his life right now. This pot hole is the passing away of his sister (WOOOHOOO!!!! Sorry Pip). Anywho, Pip was stricken with grief and immediately sent a letter to Joe, giving him his condolences and informing him that he would be attending the funeral. When Pip arrived and met up with Joe, all Joe could say was, " Pip, old chap, you know'd her when she were a fine figure of a...". Joe was heartbroken and Pip truly felt bad for him for the first time. Mr. Pumblechook was also at the funeral. Unfortunately, he was only there for the food (fat pig). Pip, Joe, and all their other relatives formed a procession down the street to the graveyard with Pip's sister's dead body. She was laid right next to her parents and four brothers. Pip then promised Joe that, after his loss, he will visit him often. However, Biddy doesn't believe that he will because he is so busy with his own life in the city (is very right, Pip probably will, most likely, never visit him. Biddy also noticed Orlick hiding under a dark tree on the day Mrs. Joe died, as well as a few minutes after she was buried(stalker). Pip, with his sister dead and a vengeful, stalking journeyman on the loose, felt very sad at the end of the day, leaving him wishing his sister was still alive.

Pip, now back from his trip, told me that he travelled to his home town to go to Miss Havisham's house to see Estella. Pip called to be let in to the house and was suprised to see Orlick (ungrateful, abusive journeyman) opening the door. In other words, he was thinking, "What the heck is Orlick doing here". orlick had left Joe and went to work for Miss Havisham as a porter. He went up to see Miss Havisham, and lo and behold, Estella was there with her. At first, Pip didn't recognize her, she was so womanly and beautiful (oh come on, gimme a break), but she had the same eyes. All this time, Miss Havisham was proceding to ask Pip questions of Estella's beauty and how her scorn and proudness are now minute traits (sketchy lady get away from my budd). As soon as Pip realized it was Estella, he immediately fell in love all over again with her (hopeless idiot falling head over heels for a girl who wants to crush your heart). He was very pleased to hear Estella say that he was less coarse and common than in the past. Miss Havisham told them to go take a walk in the garden, which they do. There Estella plays with Pip (cruel woman), whose head is in the clouds. She does this by telling him that she doesn't remember any of the moments that were very important to Pip in his life. This pains him very much, but he puts up with it because he adores her. Estella finally comes out with the truth to Pip about why she is so mean. It is because she has no heart, no sympathy or sense of caring. Pip, obviously doesn't believe this because he is blinded by love and admiration (doof). They then go in together to get ready for dinner, which Mr Jaggers is going to be at. Meanwhile, Miss Havisham continued to ask creepy questions and started to tell Pip to love her no matter if she was nice to him or if she tore up his heart. After dinner, Jaggers, Pip, Estella, and Miss Havisham went up to play cards, ending the day very similar to the way they ended in the past.

Pip, now travelling in America, wrote to me by the means of a letter, telling me of the time Joe came to visit. As he walked up the street to Pip and Herbert's house, Pip noticed how uncomfortable Joe looked. In fact, he looked as if he had never seen a city before. This is, so far, the only story that Pip has told me in which he is a snob. Becoming a gentleman has that side effect, you become disgusted of people that do not use proper manners and do other things that would embarass themselves. This is, more or less, exactly what Joe did. When Joe came in, Pip offered to take his hat, but Joe nervously ignored him and started talking to him about how everyone was back home. This was even worse than expected. Joe thought that Pip was better than him, which was too much for pip to bear. When Herbert entered the room, was introduced, and offered to shake his hand, Joe recoiled from it, to Pip's dismay. And when they sat down to drink tea, Joe put his hat on the corner of the mantel over the fireplace. It fell down at least three times before Joe bobbled the hat for a long while, until it finally came to rest in the tea bowl (clumsy man). Pip, extremely embarassed, grabbed the hat and put it on the hat rack. Pip then began to notice every single flaw that Joe had, especially when he was eating (you used to be just like him, jerk). He would stop and think sometimes, with his fork halfway between his mouth (what's wrong with that), he would break off into fits of coughing (maybe he has a cold), he sat far from the table, and dropped more food than he got in his mouth. After Herbert had left for the city, Joe revealed that he was there to deliver a message from Miss Havisham. This message was that Estella was back home. Pip is now thinking, "Man, I would have treated you a lot better if I knew that you would tell me that information". Not a good reason to be nice you conditional loving, snobby gentleman.

Pip was telling me about the first time he laid eyes upon he and his partner's apartment. His partner ( and this was a big suprise to me) turned out to be the pale young gentleman that he had beat up all those years ago at Miss Havisham's house. The first thing that the gentleman (Herbert Pocket) did was to apologize for the way he knocked him around in the past ( yeah right, you couldn't hit a fly with a fly swatter if that fly was stuck to fly paper a foot from your body). Pip , being very polite, did not denounce this claim, but accepted it from his new "room mate". Hebert, being very jolly, took an immediate liking to Pip and even gave him the nickname Handel, after the composer who had written the song "Harmonious Blacksmith". Herbert could also relate very well to Pip because he had gone to Miss Havisham's house at a young age as well. Pip found out from Herbert during their dinner that Miss Havisham's goal in life now is to wreak havoc on the male sex (sketchy, ancient crone) because on her birth and wedding day she was left at the alter by her fiance. He sent her a letter informing her that he would not be there. She received it at twenty minutes to nine and, afterwards, stopped all the clocks at that time, symbolizing that her life had stopped and now had no meaning. Her instrument in wreaking this revenge is Estella, pretty little Estella, adopted solely for this purpose. Estella, who scorns all men and is constantly encouraged by Miss Havisham to break my comerade Pip's heart (evil, wicked, sick child). All while telling Pip this story, Herbert, being ever so kind, was teaching Pip proper gentleman table manners. Pip, now chock full with information, started off with Herbert to meet his (Pip's) tutor, Mathew Pocket.

Pip, a young man now, and Joe were confronted by a man that Pip had seen once in Miss Havisham’s house at the 3 Jolly Bargemen. He was a lawyer by the name of Mr. Jaggers. He had come to inform Pip and Joe that Pip was to be released of his apprenticeship and to be brought up as a gentleman, if Joe so wished (he would be crazy not to accept this proposition). Pip and Joe, both completely astonished and overjoyed, quickly agreed to this (man, he just keeps getting luckier and luckier), Joe wanting nothing in return for the loss of Pip’s services. However, there were some conditions that came with the gentleman title (it doesn’t matter what the conditions are, he’s gonna be a rich gentleman! Pip is definitely thinking, “WOOOOOOOOO, I’m gonna be good enough to marry Estella!!! WOOOOOOO). He must always go by the name of Pip and his benefactor will remain a secret until that person chooses to reveal him/herself. He must also be tutored in the ways of a gentleman. This man will be Mathew Pocket (the same dude that is going to be at the head of the table at the loopy old hag’s funeral!). Mr. Jaggers also leaves Pip, my friend Pip, with the enormous sum of twenty guineas to by the suitable attire of a gentleman (luckeeeeyyy). Before he knows it, Pip’s dream has come true. With his head in the clouds, he told Biddy and Mrs. Joe the good news, cries of elation and congratulations coming from both of them. In five days, Pip left for London to become a true gentleman and to win the heart of the hot babe.

Pip had finally become a blacksmith, working at the forge with Joe and a journey man by the name of Orlick. Orlick was a husky fellow, very big and strong. He hated Pip because he thought that Pip would replace him at the forge (What are you thinking, that a small, inexperienced child is going to replace a strong, 25 year old man?) He convinced Pip when he was younger, that there was a devil in the corner of the forge and it needed to be fed one boy every seven years (bully). Pip was scheduled to have a half-day off, and when Orlick heard this, he complained to Joe. He also wanted half a day off on account of there being no favoring of one person compared to another at the forge (selfish, immature brat). Joe finally gave in and allowed him to have a half day off. Mrs. Joe, who was watching from the yard (stalker), immediately walked up to Joe and told him how stupid he was to give that big oaf a half a day off and pay him for it. She was furious with him. Orlick stiffly replied that she was a foul shrew (you can’t tell your employer’s wife that), putting Joe and Pip in a very uncomfortable position, between the employed and the wife of the employer. Mrs. Joe got so riled up from Orlick’s many derogatory comments that she collapsed. Joe, although unwillingly, fought Orlick and won, leaving him on his back in the dust. After the fight, Joe carried Mrs. Joe inside and cleaned up the forge. Later that evening, Mrs. Joe was found to have been attacked with leg irons. No one could prove it, but Pip knew that Orlick had done it (you don’t need to practically kill someone if one of their relation beats you up on their account), striking a fear of him in his heart.

It was time again for my chum Pip to visit Miss Havisham’s house. Estella opened the door for him and he came inside. He passed through a room with a man and three women. As soon as he entered they all looked and started to examine him. KEEP YOUR PRYING EYES TO YOURSELF PEOPLE! COME ON! He’s not all that interesting to look at! Sheesh! Anyways, Estella took him into the next room and asked Pip if she was pretty or insulting. Pip, being a kind fellow told her that she was very pretty and not as insulting as the last time he was there. With this last remark, Estella slapped Pip hard across the face. WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT FOR YOU WITCH?!?!?!?!? WHAT IS YOUR FREAKING PROBLEM?!?!?!?!?!? HE JUST TOLD YOU THAT YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL AND NICE!!!!! JEESE!! Good thing that Pip didn’t break down and cry. That would have given her way too much satisfaction. When they finally came to the old hag’s room, she asked him if he was ready to play. Pip, after all he had been through, said no. However, he did say that he was ready to work. Miss Havisham took Pip to the dining room, where an old wedding cake still sat at the table. She told Pip that the table is where she shall be put when she dies. Pip and Miss Havisham began to walk around the room, at which time her four visitors came in. They began to tell her how good she looked (Are you people blind? She’s a bag of bones.), to which she replied that she obviously did not. She revealed to Pip that it was her birthday and the only reason she knew this was because her four visitors came to visit only to ensure their place in Mrs. Havisham’s will. I almost feel sorry for the old, creepy woman. Estella and Pip played cards again, and as before, Miss Havisham was trying to get Pip to notice how beautiful Estella was. After Pip was beaten at cards, he was let out to roam in the gardens, where he met a pale boy about the same age as him. This crazy kid eagerly wanted Pip to fight him. Pip, very hesitant and confused, finally gave in and knocked him head over heels with each punch. This young gentleman jus wouldn’t give up. He yielded to Pip only after he knocked his head hard against the side of the house. After his victory, he asked to be let out. But before he was let out, Estella let him kiss her because of his victory against the boy (some guys get all the luck). This parting made Pip feel like he was flying for the rest of the day.

Pip told me just yesterday about how he made his first visit to Miss Havisham’s house. A girl his age opened the gate to the entrance of her house when he called to be let in. Pip was immediately enchanted with her beauty, in other words, she was totally H-O-T, HOT, HOT, HOT. However, she looks down on him and calls him “boy” instead of his real name, for what reason, I don’t know. Anyways, Pip is exceedingly nervous of how to act around the girl (Estella) and Miss Havisham. He is also scared to death of her house, which has no lights on. All the windows are boarded up, dust and cobwebs are covering everything, and all the clocks are stopped at twenty minutes to nine. Mrs. Havisham is a wreck, more of an old hag, and scares Pip more than everything else in her house. She is still in her wedding apparel, which has turned yellow (gross), and is surrounded by things necessary for a wedding. I mean, this lady is seriously cracked. She asks Pip, who is quite beside himself, to play to satisfy her sick fancy of seeing someone play. There is definitely something wrong with that woman. However, he obviously can’t play by himself, so he just stands there awkwardly. Mrs. Havisham tells him to call in Estella. He does and starts playing cards with her. At this point in time, he is feeling very nervous, but at the same time, very happy. I bet that he was thinking,” YEAH!!!!!! I get to play cards with the hot babe”! Now, at first though, Estella, being ever so snotty, doesn’t want to play cards with the coarse, thick boy. But after Mrs. Havisham told her that she could break his heart, she was like,” WOOHOO, I get to wreak havoc on this little kid’s heart”! After Estella had beaten Pip at cards, Pip asked Mrs. Havisham if he could go home, which was a great idea, he really needed to get out of that loony bin. Mrs. Havisham tells him to play one more game and then he could go. During this pause in the action, Mrs. Havisham starts to ask Pip personal questions like how he thought of Estella. Here is where he made his fatal flaw; you never tell a creepy old lady what you think of a girl if that girl is practically their daughter. My buddy Pip told her that he thought that Estella was very proud, insulting and pretty. This knowledge will help Mrs. Havisham in manipulating Estella to make my buddy Pip feel miserable, which is really creepy. If it was me, I would have told the old hag to get off my back. But Pip, kind and naïve as always, just decided to answer the questions. After Estella had won the second game, Pip was ready to leave. Nevertheless, Estella had one more opportunity to make Pip miserable, and of course she took it. She went to go get some food for Pip, came back with it, and put it on the ground as if he were a dog. This was just too much for my pal, and he ran away from her in tears. When Pip had finished his meal, he asked to be let out, which Estella did, all the while mocking him, making his first day at Miss Havisham’s house both wonderful and unbearable.

Pip is an extraordinary person and a great friend to me. He was brought up by his sister, Mrs. Joe, because his parents died when he was a baby. His sister is a very mean person who treats him badly and who really used to get on my nerves when I would go over to play. She was always looking for something wrong in everything he does just so that she can beat him. Anyways, Pip told me how he got the biggest surprise of his life at age eight or nine, when he ran into an escaped convict after visiting his parents’ and brothers’ graves. This convict, in desperation, threatened to tell another convict to cut out Pip’s heart and liver if he didn’t go and get him some food and a file. Pip, being very young and thoroughly terrified out of his brains, didn’t realize that he didn’t really need to return to the convict because the convict wouldn’t have a way of finding out where Pip lived. Pip thought long and hard about stealing from his sister and her husband, Joe the blacksmith, although I wouldn’t of thought for a second about stealing from that witch he calls a sister. Now Joe is Pip’s best friend, second only to me, and is his brother in law. He protects Pip from his sister’s beatings whenever he has the opportunity. Joe is very kindhearted, handsome, and a little dim-witted, which is probably how he got stuck with a horrible wife like Mrs. Joe. Anywho, Pip, being my great and trustworthy friend, shows that he knows what is right and wrong by thinking about stealing the food and file instead of just doing it. He also shows that he has a conscience because he feels horrible that he “has” to steal from Joe and Mrs. Joe to “stay alive” after he chooses to steal the food and file. When he goes back to the marshes to deliver the food and the file to the convict he meets the other convict. When he meets this convict, he becomes frozen with fear for the sole reason that this is the convict who is supposed to cut his heart and liver out, otherwise he would have stood up to that mean old convict(or at least that's what I would have done). However, the convict makes a weak swipe at him and runs away. Pip finally finds who I will refer to as Pconvict, and delivers the food and file. He leaves Pconvict with the file and runs home as fast as he can, happy that he still has his heart and liver.